A mind divided

Something important happened Friday evening. Coach Brandon Tyler, now in his 20th season leading a high school football program, recorded his 200th career win. Coach Tyler is currently the head football coach of the Sallisaw Black Diamonds. Average this 200 wins in 20 seasons. On average, how many wins each year did you get? On average?

For those of you who don’t know, Coach Tyler’s grandfather was Dick Mosely. Coach Mosely was first my high school football coach in Stigler and later a very good friend. A football coach can touch so many boys in single practice.

Coach, I can say with good authority, your granddad would be bragging on you to everyone who would listen. Well done.

Now on to less serious things than football. I consider myself to be a first-generation child of television. As I have previously noted, in the beginning, I was not enamored with television. It was simply the source of significant static on my AM radio, interfering with my listening to broadcasts of the Muskogee Reds baseball games. I complained loud and long. I could not understand why anyone would rather watch a fuzzy test pattern than listen to a baseball game.

I chuckled to myself when I heard talk of theatre dying in television’s wake.

But television slowly won me over. I stared at snowy images of Joe Friday making arrest on Dragnet. Then, the airways were filled with Gunsmoke. Ronald Reagan hosted Death Valley Days.

Anyway, I believe I have long established that I have a “lovehate” relationship with television. I have now lived enough years that the focus of my ambivalence is reality shows and commercials.

The fall television season is quick approaching. The networks are hyping their fall programming, new and old. Their commercial teases for their products are pretty good. How about that return of Matlock? Oh, it’s not. Well, maybe it ought to be. We’ll see.

Commercials. Those actually selling us products. You know what stinks? Full body deodorant commercials. I don’t think I want to hear the answer to the question, “Do you know what else stinks?”

What do I really enjoy? Have you seen the commercial with the little boy in full costume who is hustling the men through the swirling time portal? As it turns out, his portal is swirling as in the water in the toilet as he joyfully flushes away a collection of plastic figures. You can see the joy on his face as they disappear. You can hear the collective gasp of every parent when first they see it.

That thought will send each parent among us to their back porch, soda in hand and smile on our face. I like television that makes me smile.

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison. If it wasn’t for him, we’d be watching television by candlelight. – Milton Berle

Hal McBride writes a column, Just Thinkin’, published each week.